The End of the Beginning

I mentioned in my previous post that I was planning, in the rewrites, to excise "almost the entire first chapter".

I think I'd like to expand on that.

Until very recently, I'd planned to simply cut the entire first chapter and start with what used to be Chapter Two. But I wasn't really totally satisfied with the beginning. I wasn't sure it was as good a hook as I really wanted. It started with the protagonist staring up at the sky. This is not quite as boring as it sounds—there was an indication, in the first sentence, that he'd just been "caught" (though why and by whom was left unspecified till later), and the sky in question was a very unusual sky that did warrant being stared at. Still, I thought maybe I could figure out a way to do better.

A much more minor point of dissatisfaction with the beginning as it stood had to do with its location. The climax of the story takes place in the ship's hold. (More specifically, in one of its three holds, but that's not the point.) So did Chapter One. I kind of liked the fact that the story began in the same location that it ended (discounting the dénouement). It lent a feeling of going full circle that appealed to me.

Still, the more important matter was to start with a strong hook, something that would really catch the reader's attention. And I wasn't sure the existing beginning was doing it.

As so often happens, the solution, when it came to me, was so blindingly obvious I felt kind of stupid for not thinking of it before.

I'd made some effort, when writing the book, to end each chapter on a bit of a cliffhanger, or on some new revelation or hint of things to come that would (so I hoped) pique the reader's interest and motivate him to read on. Chapter One was no exception. So if the ending of the old Chapter One was designed to hook the reader, maybe it could do the job just as well as the beginning of the new one.

I tried it just now—taking the last few lines of the deleted Chapter One and grafting them onto the beginning of the new Chapter One that had previously been Chapter Two—and you know what? It works. Oh, not perfectly; there are some rough edges and it'll need a bit of reworking. But yes, it's a much, much catchier point to begin. Starting the story just a few sentences earlier than the beginning of the old Chapter Two works wonders. And, as an added bonus, it alleviates my other minor niggle too, about wanting to start the story in the same location as the climax. Great.

So... yeah. I'm much happier with the beginning of the story now then I was a few days ago.

Now I just have to get to the point that I'm as happy about the rest of it.